To exist is to change,
to change is to mature,
to mature is to go on
creating oneself endlessly.
– Henri Bergson
Early in my life my mother and grandmother taught me the basics of crochet but as a kid I didn’t appreciate crochet as an endeavor. After all, there was playing outside, running, swinging, and getting dirty to be done. Then I saw what Aunt Doris could make. My goodness! These stunning pieces of crochet lace, doilies, that we all took for granted in our lives. We had these marvelous pieces of lace all over the house covering tables, chair arms, chair backs.
“Yesterday I was clever,
so I wanted to change the world.
Today I am wise,
so I am changing myself.”
― Jalaluddin Rumi
Much later in life I started crocheting again. I crocheted a lot of scarves, shawls and ponchos. Almost all of those I gave away. It was the creating that filled me up. Now, I’m crocheting doilies. At the same time I’ve been exploring life, the universe and everything looking for the place and state of grace and being for my soul. So crocheting these beautiful doilies have become a part of my introspective journey. They have become mandalas, meditations.
“We have to continually be
jumping off cliffs and
developing our wings on the way down.”
― Kurt Vonnegut,
I’ve wanted to design my own doily for a long time. There would be two purposes in doing that for me. First to actually be able to create a doily pattern that others would like to crochet. Second to create a doily pattern that gives the feel of the Tudor Rose to make my own Rose of England tablecloth that doesn’t have to be knitted! (I have tried and failed 7 times to knit this tablecloth–totally beyond my skill set!) So I jumped off the cliff the past few days and I’m beginning to develop the “wings” of doily design for myself.
“Don’t be satisfied with stories,
how things have gone with others.
Unfold your own myth.”
― Jalaluddin Rumi,
Now, I can honestly say, if ANYONE had created the Rose of England doily I would never have begun this process. I have for years hoped that some great doily creator would write the pattern for the crochet version of The Rose of England. No one has done so yet. So I am–at least I am trying. The amazing thing is that stitch by stitch I’m creating a doily. I’m fairly certain this will not be my last one to create not because I’m great at it but because the creation has created a new awareness of myself. It doesn’t look a thing like the Rose of England tablecloth but it is a first effort that is stimulating my mind and creating more and more knowing of my inner self.
“Creativity takes courage. ”
― Henri Matisse
I hesitated about trying this because so many people have created incredible, beautiful designs and I doubted whether I could create a doily pattern. I knew I had the crochet skills–I’m really pretty good at it. My doubt was the math. No engineer in the world would be surprised that you have to understand the math of creating lace in the round. I finally found enough information on the internet to get an inkling of the math needed–how many stitches to increase each round. It turned out to be pretty simple and straightforward. So I started the creation and the only courage I’ve had to come to is to let anyone else see what I’m doing.
“The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt.”
― Sylvia Plath,
I really did not think I could do this. The fact that I am doing this gives me hope that I can create over and over again doilies and maybe someday actually reach the goal of creating a Rose of England table-cloth that is crocheted. Then the only concern will be, who will want the tablecloth?
“To be creative means to be in love with life.
You can be creative only if
you love life enough
that you want to enhance its beauty,
you want to bring a little more music to it,
a little more poetry to it,
a little more dance to it.”
The purpose of the writing of this blog post which is titled, Creating Our Lives, is to share with you my experience of purposefully creating a thing of beauty and how in that effort of creation my life has been more filled with grace and beauty. However, I believe that anytime we approach a point in our lives when a creative approach is a great choice, and we make that choice, not only does it work well, it creates a deeper sense of being more purposefully our Ipseity Self.
“The painter has the Universe in his mind and hands.”
― Leonardo da Vinci
I am no da Vinci, but like you and every human being, I am creative and excited by creativity. What do you want to create in your life? What do you want others to see in you?